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How to Have a Healthy Anger Release in 3 Steps

Updated: Jan 17


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One of the most powerful and misunderstood emotions on the vibrational scale is anger. Most people fear it and then feel out of control when they find themselves screaming at the people they love. This is because culturally, we don't really understand the purpose of anger, nor how to use it in a way that is empowering instead of destructive.


Fortunately, you have (ever-so-humble) me to teach you!




The Purpose of Anger


Anger, on the vibrational scale, is the next step up from feeling completely powerless. It is the first step in which you start taking back you personal power by shifting blame outwards.


This looks like, "it's HIS/hers/the government's/God's/etc. fault that this is happening" instead of "it's MY fault this is happening". Though not in a state of complete empowerment, it feels better than blaming yourself. It's higher on the vibrational scale. And in this state, you can work with the energy of anger to raise yourself up further.




Why Anger Feels Scary


Anger feels scary because societally we don't know how to have constructive anger releases.


What tends to happen instead is that we feel sad and powerless for a long time, until that powerlessness bubbles up inside us for so long that we can't contain it anymore. It then comes out in a volatile manner over something most likely seemingly small (like your husband didn't put away the dishes or someone cuts you off in traffic) and for a second, you feel powerful.


Until the guilt comes in for taking it out on your husband or the stranger, and then you slide back down into shame and powerlessness for wondering what's wrong with you.


This cycle of holding it all in, releasing it in a volatile, uncontrolled manner, temporarily feeling better and then feeling bad and putting yourself down again is known as the Cycle of Doom.


To get out of cycle, you have to experience a full constructive anger release.




Steps to Constructive Anger Release


1) Find a quiet place to have your anger release.


Technically, you can do them with someone else if they have experience with processing anger and won't get brought down vibrationally, but most people find anger really uncomfortable and will try to shut you down. Or you'll get uncomfortable with someone else there and try to shut yourself down.


So find a quiet place like your bedroom or alone in the woods outside to have your anger release. If you don't have a quiet place to rage, a bathroom can work just fine.



2) Let yourself get mad.


Give yourself the time to let yourself get really mad. Say the petty shit to the imaginary version of your husband or great uncle or roommate that you've secretly always wanted to say. Tell them why they're wrong. This is a space where you get to have your full volatile release with no consequences from others.


Imagine turning them into bugs and squishing them if that feels good in the moment. Cut off their head and then resuscitate them so you can do it again if that makes you feel better. Scream and punch pillows if you have to (also, if you want to scream but don't have the privacy, fill a bowl up with water and stick your face in it and scream).


These may seem like shocking things to imagine, but most people when they do an anger release for the first time envision these intense actions because the anger has been suppressed for so long. It's also important to understand your visions of murder and rage are simply representations of your feelings of powerlessness. It doesn't mean that you would actually go and murder anyone or yell at them. And the more you do anger releases, the less violent these representations become until 9 times out of 10 they only feel like a blip of anger.


It's at this point that most people also ask, "well according to the Law of Attraction, if I get angry and imagine acting like an asshole, aren't I just attracting more of that situation and of people being assholes to me in my life?"


The honest answer is no, because if you're able to have an anger release about something, it means that you already feel powerless about that subject. Having the anger release simply allows you to move beyond that feeling (and stop attracting those assholes into your life!).



3) Rate your anger release on a scale of 1 to 10


Knowing if you've fully released your anger on a subject can be tricky if you haven't had an anger release before, so the best way to review it's effectiveness is to rate the feeling of your anger release on a scale of 1 to 10 (1 being not satisfying at all and 10 being perfectly satisfied).


If your anger release is less than a 10, ask yourself, "what do I need to do to get to a 10?" and listen to what your intuition tells you. And then try it out.


You'll know once you've reached a 10 because you will feel better. The energy will have shifted, and if you try to go back to being angry, you'll find that you're not really angry about the subject anymore. It no longer bothers you.


And when you get to that 10, you'll find that your life shifts around you. The person you had so much anger about with acts nicer to you. You get a transfer and no longer work with old boss. You manifest your kids putting away the dishes. Overall, you feel better.



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Helpful? Questions? Let me know what you think in the comments below!



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