Updated: Jan 17, 2021
One of the first questions people have when discovering the Law of Attraction is it your fault when something bad happens to you? Even really bad things? Like if someone verbally abuses you (or god forbid does something even more horrible) or you get cancer, is that actually your fault because you manifested it? Are you only allowed to blame yourself? Or is that victim blaming?
The short answer: it is not your fault, but it is your responsibility to change your vibration. I'll explain more further below!
Abuse is NOT Your Fault
What I want to point out first is that abuse is never okay, and I am not condoning the actions of people who abuse and do horrible things to others. It is NOT your fault that they chose to take out their feelings of powerlessness in a violent way, and it doesn't make it okay for them to hurt you. They make their own choices, and you didn't "make" them choose to hit or hurt you.
Likewise, manifesting abuse or cancer (or anything unwanted, I'm choosing to use these two as examples because they are particularly charged subjects) is not your fault in that you did not have the awareness that you were attracting this into your life. You didn't know that you were operating at that lower vibration. No one purposefully attracts an abuser or cancer into their lives. To say that you manifested something like abuse or cancer and then blame yourself for being unworthy/stupid/bad at manifesting is, in fact, gaslighting yourself. It also keeps you in fear and shame, which feels very powerless.
Awareness, Not Blame
Though it is not your fault for being at a low enough vibration, the wonderful thing about understanding LoA is that it gives you a new tool: awareness. When you manifest anything negative into your life, it shows you that you have a limiting belief that is now showing up in the physical world.
While it is not your fault for manifesting it the first place, understanding that you did manifest unconsciously means you now have the ability to look at what came up and work through your beliefs so that you can change it. Instead of blaming and shaming yourself for the manifestation occurring, you can take responsibility for changing your vibration.
By following the vibrational scale, you can work up from powerless emotions like fear and anger to realize and release your limiting beliefs.
And the thing about working through your fears is that at that some point, you will reach a state of anger, in which blaming other is a part of the process. So you get to have your constructive anger release and blame the abuser, the government, the healthcare system, Law of Attraction itself, whatever you need to do. It's actually helpful! Pushing those feelings of powerless outwards, as long as you understand how to have a constructive anger release, will allow you to move yourself to a higher vibration. It's part of the process.
And once you work through those limiting beliefs fully, you'll find your understanding of your manifestations to come from a place of empowerment instead of a place of unworthiness.
Instead of, "I manifested an abuser because I'm a worthless piece of shit", you'll find yourself in a much kinder (and more empowered state) of, "oh, I manifested an abusive relationship because I had a limiting belief that I was a worthless piece of shit, but I've cleared that now and am ready and worthy of a wonderful, loving relationship". Or, "I manifested cancer because I'm terrible at using the Law of Attraction" to, "I manifested cancer as a way to show me that I had a fear that I was terrible at using the Law of Attraction, but I have cleared that now and am ready to step into a space of health and happiness".
A bit more empowering, no?
So to recap: it's not your fault when you manifest something bad. But it is your responsibility to work through the emotional scale to change it.
Helpful? Questions? Let me know what you think in the comments below!